Yellow Roses
by brittanydelko4ever
Summary: my entry for the OC challenge on CCOAC! Details inside, Please enjoy!


Chosen Character Emily Prentiss

Assigned Character: Sylvia Sylvester, Emily's Therapist

_**Yellow Roses**_

**Thursday, May 3, 2012 3:30 pm **

Dr. Sylvia Sylvester Was frustrated plain and simple, she had heard nothing but outstanding things about Emily Prentiss as an agent. However, the silence coming from the woman had to stop; day after day she just sat staring out the window lost in thought.

"Agent Prentiss… Agent Prentiss" Sylvia pauses, frowning at the clouded look in her patient's eyes. "Emily," the use of her first name Gets Emily's attention and she turns to face the young therapist. "This is our final Session; I really need you to talk to me so that I can give your supervisor a positive report." Sylvia explains gently

"Just tell Hotch I'm fine." Emily turns back to the window wishing she was anywhere but here, since being back on the team after the Doyle case she hadn't been able to compartmentalize as well, every now and then her emotions would slip out into her facial expression. The last think she wanted was for that to happen in front of the department's therapist.

"If I thought you were fine I would, but it's obvious you're not."

"Yeah, what do you know about it, you're what twenty-two." Emily retorts sarcastically hating that she was so obvious."

"Actually I'm 28, but that's not the issue. I'm not asking for much, just an Hour then we're done and you never have to see me again." Sylvia remains calm. After a few deep breaths Emily turns back to face her.

"His funeral was yesterday." Emily states just barely over a whisper.

"Did you go?" Sylvia inquires, grateful the appointment is heading where she wanted it to be even if she had to pull the information out of Emily.

"No." Emily adjusts her position in the chair so that she is comfortable.

"Why not?"

"I couldn't face his wife and kids, not after what I… not after what happened."

"And why do you feel what happened is your fault." Sylvia sets down her notepad and observes the older woman in front of her.

"Because it was." Emily shifts her eyes down to her lap; the last thing she wanted was this shrink getting inside her head.

"I've read multiple reports all stating otherwise, why don't you explain it to me from the beginning, help me understand what happened." Sylvia lets the suggestion hang in the air and is shocked when Emily actually takes her up on it.

"We got the call Saturday night and Flew out First thing Sunday morning. String of murders in Bull Run, the unsub was shooting the victims in the chest, dressing them in confederate uniforms and leaving the bodies in parks. We left first thing Sunday morning, and got to work as soon as we arrived." Emily pauses and makes eye contact with Sylvia for the first time that day before continuing.

"Hotch paired me with Officer Reynolds the first day and it pretty much stayed that way the whole case. We established the connection between the victims and gave the profile Monday evening, all three victims had recently moved from the south, we decided the unsub was in his late forties to early fifties. Also, that he had served in the military. Shortly after giving the profile we got a tip that Josh Clarkson was missing. He fit the profile, having moved two weeks before from Mississippi. Anyway, after a little digging we learned that he was last heard from on his way to meet with a man named Andrew Houston about buying a car that morning and hadn't shown up for work afterward. Houston also fit the profile of the unsub, 51 born and raised in Bull Run and a former marine. "

"Hotch Sent Reynolds and I to check out Clarkson's apartment, when we got there… Sorry." Emily pauses to wipe away the tear that had fallen"

"It's okay; take your time you're doing fine." Sylvia waits patiently, a few minutes later Emily continues.

"When we got to the apartment all the lights were off, the front door was open and we could hear someone inside. We both pulled our weapons, I signaled for Reynolds to follow my lead and headed in. I cleared each room one by one leading to the back of the apartment where the noise had come from. First the living room, followed by the bathroom, third was the kitchen, we found Josh in there, he was tied to a chair, bullet wound to the chest, and I sent Reynolds to check the rest of the bedroom and immediately rushed to the body, without checking the rest of the room. Why did I do that, so fucking stupid. They teach you at the academy to clear the room before checking the body."

"It was instinct sometimes our instincts overshadow protocol, we've all done it. It's nothing to beat yourself up over. I'm sure it wasn't the first or the last time you've done it." Dr. Sylvester interjects in an effort to help her justify her actions.

"But the difference this time is that someone got killed." Emily states ominously, after a few moments of silence she continues her story.

"He still had a pulse, it was weak but it was there. I started to call out to Reynolds that the victim was alive, I didn't get five words out before I felt the gun at temple." Emily subconsciously brings her hand to the right temple where the gun had been.

"Houston ordered me to kick my gun and phone away and I complied. I think Reynolds picked up on my hesitation because he ran back into the room gun drawn and ready a few seconds later. Houston immediately went on alert, Reynolds ordered him to drop the gun but he refused, said he would shot me first. Emily pauses to let everything up to this point sink in.

"Reynolds fired a shot hitting him in the shoulder; Houston hit the ground taking me with him. He was yelling in pain but still managed to fight me for the gun he'd dropped. We both had a grip on it and were struggling for control when it fired. I don't know who's fault it was, his or mine, but we heard Reynolds' body hit the floor it startled both of us, and gave me just enough control to get the gun away from Houston. I shot him in the leg disabling him enough to get to Reynolds but it was too late he was already dead."

"Do you need to take a break?" Sylvia interrupts, noting the silent tears rolling down Emily's face.

"No" Emily shakes her head. "I tried CPR, did everything I could think of, but I couldn't save him. It felt like an eternity until Hotch and JJ showed up followed by the rest of the team and a bunch of cops. Josh amazingly was still alive and the took him to the hospital After that the whole thing is a blur, It's not fair, he was so young, just made homicide detective and I killed him on his first case.."

"You didn't kill him Emily, Houston did. You did your job right, I think you should put yourself in his shoes, do exactly what he would do, and how do you feel about what happened." Sylvia Suggests, Emily is baffled for a moment wondering why she hadn't thought of it and does just that.

"The situation sucks all around, but I would expect any one to do the same thing. I still feel like crap though" Emily points out.

"That's normal and in time you'll come to terms with what happened. There's something else I want you to do, not today but when you're ready."

"What's that?"

"I want you to visit Reynolds' grave, apologize say what you need to say but ultimately I think it'll help."

"I don't think so, that's the last thing I need to do." Emily instantly goes back on guard; before she can elaborate further the timer goes off signaling the end of their session.

"All right, that's it. I'll get my report to agent Hotchner by the end of the day, and I hoe you'll take my advice." after shaking hands with the agent Sylvia watches her walk out the door and hopes that she'll be okay.

**Saturday June 23, 2012**

Two months after it all went down, Emily had come to grip with everything, the nightmares has pretty much stopped and she finally broke down and toke Dr. Sylvester's advice. The team had the weekend off so she drove out to Bull Run's Cemetery where Officer Nick Reynolds was buried. As she stood over the gravestone with a bouquet of yellow roses in hand, she stood staring at the stone, gave her apology and said a short prayer. When she was finished she placed the flowers against the stone and headed back to her car, instantly felling completely at peace

**A/N: thanks for reading for those who don't know Bull Run is a town in VA about 30 mins or so from Quantico. Also according to the internet the yellow rose means 'I'm sorry'. I hope you like it. I actually intended for this to be a funny story but I couldn't really think of anything good. If you have the time Leave a comment I'd love to know what you thought since this is the first fic I've wrote in a while(I'm a little rusty)**


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